When you experience conflict at work, your whole life can be
thrown off balance. It may seem that the people you depended
on the most can no longer be trusted.
What can you do to stabilize your life? One option is to
work together with a mediator. Many assume that the other
person would be upset by your suggesting mediation, but that
is not always the case. It shows that you care enough to try
to work it out.
Family businesses suffer when family members fight,
and all businesses suffer when members cannot see
eye-to-eye. Doing business as usual gets harder to do when
the focus is on angry people instead of mutual goals.
There are several types of conflicts: conflicts over facts,
resources, methods, psychological needs, and values, to name
a few. Most disputes include several of these components. A
mediator can help you improve your communication, focus on
the real issues, and help you brainstorm solutions that you
all can live with.
The most common response? "Why didn't we do this earlier?"
With mediation, you can work it out...together.
In workplace mediation, a neutral third party meets with
those who need to make decisions. This decision-making
process begins with an explanation of mediation,
an agreement on ground rules, and the setting of an agenda.
As each person shares his or her perspective on a given
topic, the mediator notes the remaining topics that need to
be discussed, as well as the common ground the participants
share. The next steps involve problem-solving, and
clarifying any agreements reached in mediation.
Mediation helps to create a climate for breakthrough in
communication. By having an agreed-upon process, and
providing safety for the participants, the disputants
experience a balance of power. The mediator helps those in
conflict to focus on the real issues that divide them, to
express emotions appropriately, and to understand their
common ground and shared values.
Differences are acknowledged in mediation rather than "swept
under the rug," and by bringing up the diversity of beliefs,
the mediator often helps the participants understand each
other better. Best of all, the mediator can help the
disputants collaborate on an agreed-upon solution, rather
than forcing a compromise.
Another option that has proven success is for employees to
individually take the
"Style Profile
for People at Work" by Susan
Gilmore and Patrick Fraleigh of Friendly Press. Employees
can greatly improve their communication skills by
learning about four communication styles. The style
inventory has been taught to the religious and business
communities since the early 1980s. The key is
understanding a variation of the Golden Rule. With styles,
we "do unto others" what they would have you do
unto them,
not what you would want to have done to
you. This simple premise has been expanded to include the
steps in communicating based on style, learning about own
our styles, understanding calm and storm conditions, the
stress shift, and hot tips for communicating with someone
of each of the four styles. Janet Mitchell has used
the style material for 25 years and believes it
to be crucial in helping people to communicate more
effectively.
Click the book for more information.
